Preparing in advance to develop and mature those mindsets and tools is the best gift you can give your spouse and yourself, and your future together. Your marriage relationship starts even before the first shiduch meeting and can continue to blossom during shiduchim . Hence the importance of learning about marriage even before starting shiduchim, so that you date effectively and productively.
Rabbi Shais Taub shares important facets of successful marriage, and what you can do in advance of marriage to bring your best self into the marriage.
Helping someone work through marriage issues is a huge responsibility. The number one rule in medicine “Do No Harm” is definitely apropos here. You certainly do not want to make a difficult situation even more complex. The questions you ask, the perspectives you share, the words you use; these all matter – are you helping or are you chas v’shalom making things even worse?
Rabbi Shais Taub shares some Dos and Don’ts from his experiences as a rabbi and relationship expert.
We have all learned about the Gemara that says that when someone divorces his wife, even the Mizbeach (Altar) sheds tears on his account. (Gittin 90b, Sanhedrin 22a). What does this really mean and how does it apply to ending a marriage of severe pain and abuse?
Rabbi YY Jacobson discusses: “Does the Mizbeach Cry When an Abusive Marriage Ends? An hashkafic view on ending an abusive marriage.”
Of course, your rabbi (and mashpia) is available to listen and speak with you about all matters in your life. But you can’t just hope that somehow he will divine your reason for asking for a consultation and then offer appropriate help.
All too often, Rabbis have best intentions to be helpful, but they just cannot be – they simply don’t know enough about the situation. As a result, everyone becomes frustrated and disappointed. Even worse is when the rabbi gives the wrong advice, something that might bring more harm and stress. Most often it is because vital details have not been disclosed.
What you need to know.
Online webinar with Erin Bistricer, Staff Attorney for Shalom Taskforce: Sarah's Voice
- Equitable Distribution
- Order of Protection / Exclusive Occupancy
- Family Court vs Supreme Court
- Arbitration vs Mediation vs Litigation
Communicating with your adult child, including the practical (what words to use, what not to say)
Before your child commits to marriage, what your s/he should be sure about their relationship (and how to communicate around this)
How to help your child when s/he is feeling conflicted
How to empower your child to have the 'hard conversations' during dating (about his/her own family/ medical/ past history and also about the other's)
How to do research. What questions to ask, what wording to use
It's the nuances that make all the difference in your marriage. For young marrieds.
With Mrs. Bronya Shaffer.